i miss those days when we sat together in the pc suite
looking for our next destination for the holidays
googling map to make sure we use the chance to visit any city/town possible that are close proximity to each other, within our limited time and money
i miss the different weather the places have eventhough they are next to each other
i miss experiencing the foods
the people who will usually stare at us because we looks different with our head covers
i miss the feeling of anticipation in each and every travel we had in those days
at the end of the day, im glad i''ve spent my time in europe travelling around at least i dont regret studying there for 6 years
we have photos and those sweet memories in our mind to be recalled when we are able to sit together again :)

im contented for now :)
thanks to everyone who attended the ceremony
it was all smooth
n we have decided on the date for the big day
currently there are still a few things to be bought
a few more stuff to be arranged
and pls patiently wait for the card ye :)
oh i'll msg/text for address later :)

nape nk kna ade pimple time2 camni???
knape knape knape????????

urgh rase cam tk buat ape2 pun tuk majlis tu lol
cam balik tuk majlis org lain lak hahahha
ye la sape suh takmo tuka oncall ngan zairi?
padan muke sdiri
neway cepat sgt ke?????hmmmm

i said i want an accord this yr right????
ok i wanted an accord but seems impossible with my spending habit hahahhaha
plus im putting aside some money for future occasion
so my mummy booked an altis instead
insyaAllah i'll get the car by the end of april :D

alone, hungry and lonely :( :( :(
can it became worse than that????

viva for medical posting dah lepas!!!!
that left me another 9 days in medical!
with few more days of oncall and 1 week to settle my logbook
:D :D

im so relieved when my boss announced that i pass my viva
n am looking forward for surgery :D

lamenya tk tulis anything in this blog
i've been busy as expected from medical posting
but it has been enjoyable
eventhough i have to admit it is tiring and very busy
im still handling female ward
which in my opinion is a bit more complicated then male ward
male ward usually came with straight forward kind of cases
unlike female who always always presented with complex history
they say yes they have problem with every single systems of their body
so nk buat ape????tx every single system ke?
huh
nway
my car bumper was hit from behind by my own hospital pharmacist houseman's car
i'll have my relative to fix it for me tomorrow while im oncall
n then i'll be going to KT to see my *ehem2*!!
no la, im going to KT for dengue course
but yes will find time to see him :D

it has been hectic for the past two days
n im oncall again tomorrow
of which i feel so unhappy about it
my feet need massage so badly
i dont feel like standing fr ward round
for blood taking etc etc
we got this two patients who always require branula
the lifetime of their branula is usually one day only
n u have to poke them at difficult small vessel each day
one has ESRF so yes difficulty difficult small line,her hand is so small
it looks like my sister's when she was in standard three or two
the other one has post-cva epilepsy
u might accidentally lost/bump the line if she so happen having fits
while u were doing the line gah
im tired......

woke up from the wrong side of the bed today
i burnt a hole on my beautiful kurung batik while ironing it this morning
this is the first time this kind of thing happen
but why does it have to be my batik?!??!?! :( :( :(
dah la mahal, n it was my most beautiful batik ugh :(
i hardly wear it bcos im afraid its thin material may not tolerate my work in the ward
waaa sedihnya :(
tp nasib baik not my crepe batik heh

ok that was written 2 days ago
so today, went to work in the morning to find out
work round was already done by the MO
yeay tk yah buat round haha
went to pekan to visit my little sister
bought her a new sony ericsson phone on the way there
i think i might bought it for myself if i didnt have my HTC right now
cute nye phone n she was delighted telling my mom after that hehe
ok esok oncall n i have a presentation to be done on monday

my * bought me a new crepe batik today :D
happy nye :D thank u!

i want an accord! this yr!

i know im not always straight forward
but this is just ridicilous
do i need to spell it out to u word by word??
pls understand that IM NOT INTERESTED

gah today tido sampai tokle tido dh
finally qada' all the sleep in need! :D
tp bosan jugak sbb tk tau nk buat ape
all the magazines yg ade pun tk menarik sgt
internet pun tk menarik
well maybe dh penat cuti
so esok start keja balik!

i wasnt planning to go home this weekend but since
this one driver insisted
so i followed him back home n back here
again in kemaman in one day
woah crazy tak???tp i wasnt the one driving so
suke sbb bley balik umah even for 2 hours
of which i spent tido again n iron baju hahaha
tk productive lgsg la kn balik umah
tp bley jumpe mummy so ok la ;)
reached kemaman quite late as expected

my second day of cuti was spent travelling to kuala lipis phg
yg i ingat dekat tp sbenarnya tak
my mum sent me a text asking where exactly
was our destination, KL ke kuala lipis
so i told her, KL stand for kuala lipis jugak ape hahahaha
mesti my mum bengang time tu
anyway the wedding ceremony was nearly
reaching its end time kitaorg sampai
n guess what i saw few juniors from smapk!
thats not the only surprise
the bride was actually my junior
gagagga cume my batch tkde la heh
n they called me kak najmi
urgh kantoi la umur sye.....

ok tonight terkantoi yg tak bley cover langsung!!!!
just imagined u sat just a table apart from them n yes
they noticed u when u were taking a seat
there wasnt a way out we had to say hello n b friendly gagaggaga
i know people knew but this is just unexpected n i just dont know how to act lol
anyway i'll just go with muke selambe je la esok to ward haha

today was busssyyyyy!!!!
i wanted to stay n help out but im too tired
the ward was too crowded especially during visiting hours
medical is too different from ortho
though i love it since we are allow to do procedure here
but the work load is just BANYAK
btw i managed to perform 4 peritoneal dialysis
tried to insert one long line but failed uhuhu
never mind there will always b a second time ;)
im taking 3 days leave this coming weekend
the plan is to go jln2 with cough*but it started raining few days now
so if the water level keep increasing we might get stuck in kemaman
n i dont think i'll be able to go home in besut because of the flood that's going on now

urgh i think im hungry again :(

skrang dah ade geng chubby haha, nabilah's flight from kb was at 9 today
i drove her there ~6.30 am n of course we missed one junction but
i made a u turn n we reached the airport at 7.30 am

she accompanied me shopping for my new room in kemaman
but as expected i spent more on stuff which is not essential
like 3 akemi comforter sets-king size with different colour n design
they are irresistable!!! can u imagine the original prize was close
to thousand per set but i got it for less than 200 per set
so yes i have to buy them :p haha
but then no sunglasses for me yet
i'll put aside some money next month for the glasses
i bought some curtain which will need someone to put up the rail
some more pillow n bolster
one small cupboard which need to b put together later
n one stand to hang my clothes (more like my tudung)
n today after sending her to airport i went to tesco n found the
rotan-like box for my laundry however i didnt get the size that i want
they only have medium n small size so i took the medium one



oh did i mention that im taking back what i said previously :p
got this in kuantan-cantik tk baju raye saye???
imagined me in that in the ot changing room-i was oncall
on my first day raye lol n we had one operation that day

best nya kalo bley mengutuk without the doubt that u'll find out
ni ade palpitation lak kalo nk mengutuk since everyone can read malay heh

anyway im kinda tired - i can still hear intan said "dh start dah perangai lame dia" haha
but i am...........
i honestly dont know where to go from now
should i put u behind as a history or keep u as a case to be reviewed later?
am i making myself confuse????? :(

anyway im at home
my sister from india is on holiday
will be spending a few days in malaysia
as she spent the rest in australia with her bf
we will be going for window shopping or maybe shopping for real tomorrow at KB
oh today pecah record bwk keta!i took 3 hours only from kemaman to besut!maybe sbb today bukan school or raye holidays kot ;)

i think i wrote another draft to b published when i have some free time but seems like it's gone
anyway im home today in besut, been driving for close to 5 hours
n i actually chose a different route without realizing it till it's too late n impossible to turn around to find the familiar route i normally used
instead of 3 roundabout
i probably took a different turn n ended going into permaisuri area,my father used to teach at sek.men sultan ibrahim (not sure whether sultan ke bukan sultan lol haha ke maybe sek men tengku ibrahim?)
anyway highway nye ade lalu area2 construction n felda n ladang2 sawit
lucky me my car's oil was enough ;)

im soooooo tired today, i was up till 4 am yesterday - oncall
n my minute sleep was disturbed-someone misread my instruction n thought my pt needs branula when i wrote legibly it's a CAP not IV anyway takpe la since i skipped the round today pun ;D hahha

This is the first raye yg i bought baju raye,in previous yrs i made my own. Td g kuantan n i swear lps ni i wont park kt parkson yg the nearest to entrance of kuantan tu-tinggi btul blum sampai i already felt like throwing up sbb jln pusing2 naik atas.

ok my profile photo is gone as well! grgrggrgr

Ok i think my smart phone just decided on its own to delete my 1st paragraph for the previous entry. Tp sye pun lupe ape sye tulis daaaa

im at my relative's place, bukak pose here today, tp not everyone is home eventhough school hols has already started

Anyway work is getting busier,well my workload may not b as much as those working in bigger university hosp but eid is getting closer which means we r expecting more accidents n more diabetic foot for abx or straight for bka,aka or ray's amputation. So far im enjoying myself. The company here is good as well the only things lacking here is the place to spent my money!urgh mesra mall is too small a place to go shopping :(

i've been called to attend BTN n induction next monday
which means my working life will start the following week
it's been busy since last friday the day which i went to
register with KKM n SPA, as well as lapor diri in MARA
i didnt go to MMC because of some technical problem with
my MMC provisional registration form
but i managed to post the completed form this week on sunday 11th of july.
because of the late registration with MMC
i honestly thought they wont call me for work this early
n i actually used computer printed transcripts
only that i have my medical office to stamp them for me
we need them for the registration n thank god that lady doctor at the MMC
approved my printed version transcripts-they emailed me
on 15th of july with the approval,giler cepat la,
i called the person in charge at 2.45pm on thursday
informing my BTN n induction will need me to submit
the surat pengakuan registration with MMC
n by 4 i got the email!
but the registration number will only be available in two weeks time ;)

i have mixed feelings about work n this btn n induction
am hoping for a place in HUSM but
the thing is HUSM has its own students :(
oh not to mention i still have the work clothes issue to b solved
mane nk carik baju my size in abundance in such a short time ni???
my mum suggested i cilok dayana's baju but hers are of different size
well a bit off from my size la

anyway im heading off to KL at 9pm tomorrow night ;)
oh yes my baju raye is only half way siap gagaggaga

1-this just doesnt make sense, how can we ask for smthg with

straight faces when in normal circumstances we know

we shouldnt, bcos we have no right for that?

did u just overlooked that n asked anyway?

seems like i could not play along with that, sorry.

2-i was browsing through maher's profile when i came across some

thread between his friend n him talking about medical check up

that they have to do, n this one sentence said, sort of like this

"aku dah buat check up marin", n before that my brother told

this friend of his, that he's waiting for H1N1 test, so immediately

i thought, oh they have another new test that i have never heard

before, but why does it sound like water related test???

marin as in MARINA or smthg, then i went to dayana's page,

n in this one comment she said, "ma dok bising jak marin lagi"

wahahhahaha marin as in smalam ke sbenarnya!!

ape la asal nk kna campur bahasa kang dah tk phm lol

3-i listen to lots of singer n beyonce included but

this one is a cover performed by a guy named sam tsui, enjoy! ;)

1-some small cute little puppy tried to climb onto my lap today,

but he was too short and i was on a bench sitting,

thus he only managed to stand on his two hind legs

with the other two paws against my kain baju kurung

standing n asking for attention at the same time........

omg he is waay to cute to b kicked aside,

plus the owner was just there watching n smiling as if happy

because he know his puppy is just too cute in asking

for attention n trying to play with us.....i ended stroking the puppy's head ooops........

2-ok that was the main event for today!?

or maybe not, it's just that it was depressing to remember

of how people can b sooooo snobbish n bossy that u would just want

to delete the memory, as if the option is available anyway.

haiish u look like a nice person in picture but in reality u r actually not,

why cant u hold ur tongue woman?

3-i think i want grey for my wedding baju!

hahahah mane calonnya pun tak tau

pandai2 pilih kaler dah gagagaga

senangnya pilih kaler kalo my calon is cerah :p

it's true isnt't it

love starts from the eyes

n tears will fall when u try closing ur eyes

pretending not to see them

but will it help if u r totally totally apart?

ape yg kamu download ni, besa btul 1.63 GB

brape lame nk kna tunggu ni daaaa

ok suda contact putra venture people! they r charging approximately 130 e for 6 boxes which is ok la kot to reach my house in terengganu ;)

i'll have to settle all the payment by tomorrow n print all the details they have given

hopefully the weather behave as it did today haha

oh there might be some changes in the plan for my visiting mummy

we might stay in london from 12 up to 15 th of june instead of coming straight to galway

ayesha's mother is in the same flight so i'll have someone else to jalan with in london only

farah n sister wil be joining us as well

but pls god make the flight ticket cheap! gagagga

so far i still have 2 patricia cornwell, 1 anne rice and 1 buku curik from castelbar club buku crite begging to be read by my lazy bum self right now

haaish apesal la malas sgt nih

i think the lazy part of me somehow know i dont have anything urgent that needs to be done

eventhough there is several things that need my attention seperti:

1-contacting the putra venture people = my mum ckp she wants to handle it but sye ragu2 pule ehehe maybe i'll do the contacting tonight, through email pun bukan susah n the lady is msian n she speaks malay la kn haha

2-mending my newly bought seluar well jegging to b exact but it wont look like one when im done with it so dont worry i wont b wearing the skin tight nye jegging ;)

3-updating my photos in facebook! gah this one really need to b on top of the list patutnya, the last time was before the exam ke between the exam? hmmm

4-oh i need to find bag(???) n shoes/sandal for my graduation! unfortunately i accidentally deleted the only photos of my grad-baju material&colour which my sister sent me thus it's a gamble if i want to buy them now without anything as reference ye la kang tk masuk kaler lak heh

ok tu je that i can think of now, im physically in my room but my mind is in town already hahah am actually waiting for ayesha siddiqah to go to town for god knows how many times dah since our xam is finished ;)

senangnya kalo bley live ur life n do whatever u desire

without having to think of other people

senangnya if whatever we do wont affect anyone

tapi living ur life means involving every other people around u

be it intentionally or not

how can we live our life following our own decision everytime

without considering other people's point of view or feeling

how could we live that way

maybe we can but

we might as well live in a desert or somewhere

where no one is around

bcos human is full of feelings which may or may not b easily read/interpret by others

finally the week is ending

n the xams are OVER!!!!

some unexpected things happened but

i think they were all well mnged

today was the last part of final xam

obstetric n gynaecology subject

thank god there wasnt any short case

tp nk tgk ape pun kn?haha

didnt get called for any oral with any prof

which im so relieved

hopefully everything is fine! ;)

nerd at school only lol ;)

omg rase mau jerit n say

WHAT? do u think i wouldnt understand ur broken french?!

u even use broken english do u expect me to believe

ur french is perfect?!

bley blah!

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/22/20100415/tuk-uk-britain-airports-fa6b408.html

Volcanic ash turns north Europe into no-fly zone

waaa asal byk gler distraction ni

STUDY STUDY la!!!

ari ni rase nk pelempang org pun ade

apparently u r too ignorant!!!

yana i need ur love!

mane ko today ni??

ape yg kamu buat ni??!?!?!

u r making me confused!!!!

urgh sampai hati kamu....

some chinese girl came up to me in college today

and said "hiiiiii u r (some unrecognizable msian name) right?1st yr right?"

what do i make of that???

one thing for sure - seems like i still have that 1st yr innocence face haha

but it is kinda rude not to know ur seniors

this one doesnt have 'the dance' haha

go here go here!!!

http://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=107621775919621&ref=mf

omg gle cute!!!! :D

mlm ni terpksa buat karangan since how many yrs dh ntah tak buat
hopefully takyah kna re-do ke ape ;)
i think baru terase bahang xam ni
when people asked u to write smthg as kenang2an
omg 6 yrs dh nk abis dh!!
the memories r still fresh lg
the first day in dublin, dgn penatnya kna naik bas
for another 4 hours-dh la lame pening lak tu
nasib baik penat n bley tido n tak hujan sgt
mlmnya hujan though
n sejuk!!! haha
baru tau bknnya best sgt pun ireland ni
hujan je most of the time
tp yr by yr i come to like it
if someone asked me to choose again
i wont choose any other place or any other friends yg ade here
sye suke this place yg always hujan n the people around me :)
tp 6 yrs in galway + 1yr in asasi + 5 yrs in smapk = 12 yrs apart from my family
ye la w/pun ade cuti time skolah
it's still 8 hours by car, n i only went back time cuti yg pnjg2 je
so yes im going back home to msia!
tp kadang2 i came to think
how am i gonna live without these people around me anymore????
urgh seday nya.... :'(
wont it be nice kalo one of u guys can stay with me :D
haha wishful thinkng btul-tp that way we wont b lonely..... except nasrul, n intan la kn :p

rasenya im a bit cranky this past few days
sorry i cant tolerate some stupid jokes
or some remarks which suppose to b funny for u
all i want to do is huddle up in my room with no
other noises except for my laptop or my SISTER/BROTHER calling me
dont text me if it's not IMPORTANT
or dont ask questions when u ALREADY have the answer or
u want an answer that SUITS ONLY U bcos i might not b able
to give u that-but i can offer u an honest,
call it a ruthless answer if u want
bcos i think i am heartless at times

yes my neck n shoulders r hurting
tension is definitely in the air

attachment kt letterkenny dh abis!!!
tk sabar nk balik galway unfortunately termiss bus this morning hahahha
so skarang melepak umah jawe n the gang dlu
next bus kul 12 nnt this time we'll make sure terpacak kt situ
half an hour earlier!!kakakkaka
anyhow tk tau camne bley termiss bus, tk terpikir
letterkenny bley jam, kalo tk we'll surely b on the road to galway dh
tp takpela heh

sebulan rase kjap je, we didnt even go back to galway for weekend
ye la 5 hours journey is too long la
n that's only one way, kalo balik mesti abiskn mase 10 hours on the us je
tp tk g mane2 pun
punyela bawak passport skali in case nk g mane2 haha
tp tk sampai lak
agak busy la jugak
everyday pun ade tutorial tp this week mr.S tk kasi tutorial...?
or maybe dia nk kasi today tp kitaorg dh blah
hopefuy dia tk call galway n tanye mane budak2 yg patutnya buat attachment surgery ni?????
yg patutnya ade for his tutorial???!?!??!gah kalo dia call
tk tau la ape jd hahaha

urgh galway cam lg busy, takpe2 sebulan dua je lg then bley tone down sket?ye ke?hahahha
tp maybe dh kna pulun grggrgrggrgrg

ade unsecured networks!!ok so bley access internet :D

so far nearly 1 week dh kt letterkenny
tp tk penh jumpe consultant pun lg
even the reg doesnt know where the consultant is
but anyway there's one incidence
when the reg said, he'll give tutorial after he's done with cystoscopy
but then he rephrased it-maybe we can discuss smthg
when the consultant arrived at the theatre
bcos he'll b freed from theatre
n yes he didnt mention anything about us students to go n see the consultant
n on the 1st day the coordinator told us directly that the consultant
is not that fond of student so dont feel downhearted!haha ape la
but this is totally not as i expected
i know what they all tried to say but u know i didnt imagine it to b to this extent
we r totally being push away so we wont see the consultant
but i dont mind
lots of the doctors r willing to offer some time n knowledge to the many2 msian students here

lots of tutorial n some crap Hx this week
-but i'll try harder next week!! ;)

i need help
can we have an open session again?

yay my kari ikan is coming!!! heehehe
omg asyik pikir mkn je ni
study group pun mkn
sblum g study group pun mkn
time tido je tokle mkn
haaih gemuk jugak la camni kakaka

tp dh lame out of kari ikan nya stock so rindu la :D

avatar was brilliant!
well in terms of the plot it wasnt that complicated
but i enjoy it as this might be the only several movies
with the ending that i like haha
n yeah love the colourful world they have in that pandora
even the people are made purple in colour

oh havent fnished uploading the photos from munich/salzburg
so many to pick from
bcos my laptop is old n couldnt use the easier way of uploading photos
the one with the java application
if i tried it'll take 30min for 20 photos
to try to upload
n i dont have to wait to see, in the end it'll say
failure to upload
so might as well use the old version of uploading

u know everyone is talking about kawen!!!
why?!?!?!?!??!!!!!
can we just finish off this med school n not think about it 1st?
i wish im one of the lucky ones toooooooo haha
blerggh ape2 la
ye someone told me
takpe tunggu je
kakaka ok fine aku tunggu je la
hopefully by the end of the med school someone will come
n propose haha
ok tk nk merepek dah :p

i have lotssssssss to write in here
tp my fingers r growing numbbbbbb
n i forgot where i threw my fingerless gloves
-at least some part of the fingers r still protected from this coldness
speaking of that-galway is freezing
the frost is everywhere!!!
n today the sun wasnt that much of a help
it's there but the warmth couldnt b felt at all
our backyard is still frozen even when now is 2.38 pm already
how r we suppose to go to letterkenny in january?!?!
i can imagine how cold it would b
n what's gonna happen with our plan for giant causeway???
urgh i've been here nearly 6 yrs n havent set foot there
pls dont b so freezing cold nnt!

oh btw im still waiting for jawe to upload gamba2 kawen kakaknya
manenya ni????

ok ade lagu best baru ;) hehe



rossa ni skali tgk cam siti pun ade
tk ke??

i admit
i am a bit impatient ;)
:D

oh safe trip everyone!!!

n c U in a week time :)

sye rindu kah?????
come talk to me pls..... :(

urgh ade org bgtau @ remind me
of 'no such thing as hati baik but pakaian tk baik/seksi sket'
nk tergelak pun ade
sbb truthfully she was talking about someone else
unfortunately terkena batang hidung lak haha
anyway mmg ade blaja dlu2
ape maksudnya menutup aurat
u know kain tk nmpk kaler kulit
n tutup area mane2 tu n longgar sket,
tp somehow those few lessons r
fading-maybe a bit fast from my brain
bagus la for u to remind me-tp i know u dont read my blog
so u wont know im saying thanks for u here haha
ye i'll try to b perfect in ur eyes k ;)

omg hari ni i dont know why
tp penat nya!!!
during the last tutorial-i was standing against the door
trying to rest my back
been standing since morning in the ward round, the clinic
then the theatre+hx pre-op jugak
met ayesha when the theatre was done
n decided to follow her for the ortho tutorial
usually i'll get a signal from my grumbling tummy that i need to sit down
at least for a snack b4 continue with anything else later in the day
tp hari ni perut tk bunyik pulak haha
oh they used leeches today!!!for haematoma dlm flap!
1 leech = 5 euro! but they killed them afterwards by pouring some alcohol, poor thing

today my dr in the team
spoke

spanish
french un petite peu
n earlier in the week
he spoke gaelic!!!!

so he knew at least 4 languages!

hehe dah tgk 500 days of summer
at the end that guy met another girl
but this time her name is autumn hahahah
oh it'll b good if someone can come n SERIUOSLY say
i want to marry u
tp that someone mesti la has a good background
n yeah dont think people wont go n check up on u
if u gave some reference
reverse psychology might not work here
people just might do what u said ok ;p

omg i just realised my number of entries has slopped down compared to years back!
anyway this is a way to naik kan a bit hahahha

oh that's not the main point for this entry
true blood=yes i tried several times to watch it in astro at home
but the kids were getting in the way
so i ended with either changing the channel when they were watching along
or shooed them away
ye la there were scenes which are not appropriate for their age
anyhow, farah n rafiq have the buku crite
but i still want my vampire to remain as what anne rice describe
im not yet ready to put shape shifter in the same story
well though lestat met several weird creatures or went to hell or other weird places
but yes i want them to remain as what the movie interview with the vampire portrayed them as, maybe when im trully done with the chronicles that i'll start looking for different version of vampire ;)

regarding my last entry
it's true we cant control our feelings but
people differ in a way that some may b able to let go quickly n some just get stuck thinking of the same thing all the time
should i say im fortunate@unfortunate, that im the former??? haha
so yes i'll let go when i want to n yes i wont turn back
saye rase as if i dont have attachment to someone/thing hmmm

susah jugak bile senang kecik hati...
tp, hati bukannya boleh di control2...
mungkin, avoidance is the best

ok now this is really going on n on in my head



finally got my case!!
the reg went looking for us in the ct room this after noon
bcos he wont b here tomorrow
he went through the history n also the most important part of all
the ct/us/xray etc baik btul hehe :D

oh my attachment is a mess la
asl la bk sgt benda nya ni.................

usually ade someone yg we can always turn around n talk to
bcos of the closeness we tend to have stronger
feeling to whatever their reactions r towards smthg
concerning us@maybe everything
but we r not mind readers so we cannot tell what they r thinking or feeling n im afraid there will always b a guilty feeling when they didnt respond as what
we expect they would to smthg we did/ask/tell them etc
the hardest thing is actually when it happened n we didnt say anything @they didnt tell us anything
but the silent hurts

dejected

i've been home close to two weeks now
with no one else other than my mum who can drive
i've to finally put into usage my driving license n my
long forgotten driving lessons
so my day starts as early as those school kids
i have to send my little sister to her school which is just
a few minutes from our house
n if my mum is a bit late for the day, i'll have to send
the other two sisters of mine to their school as well
then i have to drive back home to pick up dayana n
send her to her driving class
haha i actually finding myself enjoying driving
n my mum doesnt care if i want to drive her vios
instead of my dad's sentra even though i just
mustered my courage to finally drive on the second day i arrived home
i actually never drive b4 other than during the actual driving classes keke
n its actually a wonder my mum even told me to use her car if i so wanted to
n guess what she said ok when i jokingly said i want
to drive in ireland if i ever got the chance to ;)

i wish i could go roaming all the secondhand bookshops n
buy all the mayfair witches books by anne rice right this moment!!!
the witching hour left me craving for more
i want to know what happen with the newborn lasher
n what exactly is taltos
sometimes the story gets entwined with vampire chronicles which makes
the more reason for me to read all the rest of the vampire chronicle
there's still several books from the vampire chronicle which i
couldnt get my hands on them bcos it's kinda hard to get them here
n i dont think i ever found them if not in secondhand bookshops
gah if only i have time for that
the truth is the books were there in front of me all the time
covered by dust in most of the time, on the shelves in my room
i bought them when i came across anne rice whenever i visited the secondhand
bookshop but time is the only thing which is not quite enough i would say
for us medical students-or maybe me bcos i cant read (buku crite only hehe) without
forgetting the rest of the world
guess what happened the other day?
i heard knocking on the front door several times past few days
but i was reading the witching our at that time
n yes the story is about the mayfair witches with their spirits
the knocking wasnt that loud n maybe the rain n wind were playing some part as well
so it wasnt loud enough for me to believe someone is at the door
the knocking occured for several days n i kept thinking
maybe im imagining things so i let it be
but on the weekend i was sleeping n was startled awake by the noise
i was startled which means i wasnt thinking straight n just ran down the stairs
directly to the front door
n there stood my senior an intern all smiling bcos
at last!! someone open the door for her hahaha
n me the sleepyhead was told it was her n not my imagination that's being
pounding the front door - that's what it took for me to hear her finally

haha terase lawak pulak
but anyway iqbal's here in galway
im currently using his old laptop
bcos mine is out of battery n the charger is not working bcos
the wire finally snapped putus n i couldnt do anything to sambungkn balik
n just too lazy to get out of my cozy room to buy another one
so im buying that charger in msia la nampaknya :)
i havent pack
dont think i'll b bringing much with me anyway ;)

the 1st photo is the bottom one so the 1st on the list is actually the last photo ok
shouldnt b explaining that but i dont have anything to say pun so yes y not

one of our friends put out her wedding invitation card on the fb
the date is on 2nd of august
i've never been to any of my friends' wedding
my place is just too far from everyone else
n even if i took a flight over
the airport is still like 2 or more hours from my house
it might be easier when my dad is still around
bcos he always available to drive us anywhere we want
but seems everything is different now
the only person who can pick us up from the airport is my mum
n she's working till after 3 at least
it's very rare to see her at the house before 3
sometimes i thought maybe i should just take kereta sewa to go back home
but honestly i dont have enough trust in me on them
n not to mention i dont even know the way they drive
i might die of heart atck b4 i reach home who knows haha
so i guess i wont b able to go this one either

kawan2 semua,

SYE SUDAH BELI TIKET!!!!!!!!! :D

finally beli jugak
setelah pening kepala beberape hari hehe
but anyway its on 29th of july from shannon
but will have to take the earliest bus from
galway station around 3 in the morning

n thank you aman! = card dia :D

im stuffing myself with 2 large sizzler pizzas this weekend
was planning to go out during the day n find some stuff for
cooking but it turned out raining

i was blog-hopping this week :D
n yes found some interesting blogs acting as online shops
the items seem pretty goods-in photos
but they got good reviews too so maybe they really are good
but anyhow i couldnt stop wondering how/where they get their hands on the goods
my sister went to bandung n just arrived home yesterday
she brought back several pieces of kebaya with embroidery
from the description they are quite similar to those i saw online
n the price are pretty much the same-well can only b applied to several blogs though
so yes b careful if u want to buy stuff online ye :)

i came across a blog selling baju kurung/kebaya etc
but the price is a little off
i know how much it cost for like thai silk-they came from thai
so a little cheaper i guess or is it because my place
is close to the border that i get them cheaper??
anyway, the price look ridicilously
high for that type of kain-mind u they can b thrown
into a washing machine to make life easier for u
but maybe they are charging for their skills in making the kain into a baju kot

i believe i've committed a crime today
thus i have to study tomorrow!! hahahah

i no longer have the drive to attend any tutorial, wr, or anything else related to hospital!!!!
gah i wanna go home or maybe just away from galway for a little while
sometimes it feels like i'm all drained n exhausted
summer is tooooo hot when u r in the clinic or running around in the wards
n it's hard n frustrating when u cant say that to real people
without getting mock-yes then why r u here doing attachment? that sort of words u know

rasenya ayat2 biase pun bley buat org kecik hati
kalo sket2 tkpe la maybe sye tk kisah
tp kalo byk kali
then maybe bley meletup n lari je dr kamu, mau ke??
ke itu point nya?hmmm

hari ni rase pnjg nyaaaaa
apsal tk mlm2 lg ni???
penat dh tgk matahari sinar2 tu
nasib baik clinic sampai tgh hari je
kalo tk mau pengsan dlm clinic yg panas tu

oh kitaorg bli tiket ke paris 12/6 ni hehe
haaih pandai btul, mesti hangus ble balik dr paris tu nnt
rase nya ni kali ketiga g sane
tkpe la skali skala manje kn diri kekeke
n yes someone reminded me that
i didnt get anything for myself on my birthday
so bley la ni as a gift for myself :D
nnt pg with aman, qama, rafiq, intan n farah
hopefully the weather will stay as bright as this
ye la then baru puas jln2
tp sye mau tgk eiffel time mlm jugak
n now mlm start around kul 10 hmmmm

ye kami pegi dock lg for the second time hehe
why???
sbb these prawnies were calling us haha

take a look at the size of prawnies ni
BESAR!! n sedap, really :D
i wasnt really interested in eating those at first
but once i took a bite, tok le berenti lak
nasib baik line tuk bli tu pnjg
kalo tak maybe kami bli lg :)

we went to our classmates' bbq lps tu
not all people were invited though
n just b4 we reached the house
we bumped into one of those yg tk dijemput

tp dsbbkn we didnt know at that time yg only certain people were invited
like usual, we said hi n tanye mane umah bbq tu
her face changed!n demanded to know whose bbq we were referring
we knew it then-dia tk tau rupenya
feel like lari je dr situ hahha
semua pun cam dh glabah sket-ape nk jawab nih hahah

n yes all the meat were not halal so we made a 2nd trip to town
to charcoal lak :D
ye cuti is for mkn + jln2 + shopping + tido
but unfortunately it's too hot to b sleeping in this summer :(
sye mau kipas angin!!! :(

i got a text msg from mummy pg td
wish happy birthday
tp silap ari plak
mummy lupe ingtkn dh 27/05 kt sini
tp dia kate tkpe la dia jd org first wish
though silap hari haha

hari ni seperti slalu, hujan
Volvo race dlm hujan la maksudnya haha
tk tau volvo race??
sile google sdiri :p

skarang sudah lapar grgrgrg
tp dapur rase cam jauh sgt sgt
coco pops hampir habis
ayam lupe lak nk kuarkn pg ni
mkn ayam kashmir ptg ni saje la :D
tp lambatnya nk pukul 730
rase macam puase pulak heh

called mummy
katenya semua kna ade tuk tnh/whatever nya urusan
hmm but i wont b there till at least august
harap2 bley kasi duit je dkt kakak itu
umah mesti sepi saje pagi2
slalunya abah ade kejut kn semua org yg tk pegi skolah heh
skarang pg2 mesti tkde nasi bungkus or kuih2 atas meja dh
mummy ckp
ptg2 mesti burung2 yg abah used to bela pulang
mkn2/main2 dpn laman umah
cari tuannya agaknya
sian burung2 tu
kucing2 pun mesti tkde org kasi mknn
kesian diaorg

nabilah dh sampai india
dh jumpe si zola (tk tau eja)
tp budak tu buat bodo je katenya
nk aja cari dlm friendster mane satu si zola tu
tkpe la people can do/say whatever they want
cume baik tidak je
tp susah jugak kalo diaorg salah interpret mane baik mane salah haha

farah yg hampir jatuh ke dlm air sungai

oops ade doggy berenang
now that reminds me-when did i celup tgn dlm air itu?
selepas anjing itu lalu ke sebelum??mmmm

sasaran si doggy = swan
tp swan tu mengelak sket so tk kna tangkap hehe

text or msgs
we tend to read with emotion r we not?
am i the only weird person to put emotion in those words?
i'll usually imagine how the person
was like when she/he sends me text/msg

wouldnt it b nice if the sun is out shining n we have our cup ice cream with us?
maybe tomorrow will b better?or not? :p

abah passed away on 3rd of may at 3 pm
but thank God everything went smoothly
here n at home
mum was so sad as does all of us
my sister in india took a flight on monday morning
i wish i could do the same thing but
i couldnt change anything
it was hard at first to digest the news
but when i rethink
mum was by his side for the whole week
accompanying him
she was practically staying in the same ward
taking care of him till the last moment
telling him to say Allah n all,
he did not suffer for a long time
n we talked to him on phone almost every
day when he was in the hosp,
looking back at his life i believe
he did what he needed to do
his life was pretty much completed
seeing us all grown up with
my sister giving him a couple of grandchildren,
retiring from his work as a teacher
gave him more time for himself n the family,
these past few years
he was able to go to masjid or staying up late for tahlil at other people's house
im very much proud that he's like that
i remembered he'll bring home some kuih from the majlis he joined
his tahlil/quran group 'll probably missed him too
as we do now
but the time has come for us to let him go
n yes the only thing we can do is to remember him in our prayers n bacakn yaasin for him
n thank you everyone for all the things u've helped us with :)

urgh we have to re-sit paeds slide!
the paeds-photos book in the library is no longer there
waa sape la yg gatal mulut pg bgtau deprtmnt nih?!?!

the result is out!!
10 to 12 in the afternoon!!!ggrgrgr
but Alhamdulillah :D hehe

i had my books opened n ready to b read but all i could think of
is my paeds osce, so now bley concentrate :D well hopefully la kn
i need to call my mum 1st ;)

my dad is in the hospital for an operation
instead of today-it's been postponed to tomorrow
mum sounds a bit worried initially while i was on phone with her
but she's alright now i think
it's not that big of an operation
but it is for him n my mother
i can sense the doubt in his voice n i knew
he would opt for not going through with it if not for my mother
hehe
today-he saw some of the med students in the hospital
he said one of them look like me
n the night b4 that he asked me again
if im really not going back for summer
i told him no
but listening to him n my mother
maybe i should go home instead of staying

1-what happen if u reject someone's friend request on fb?
do they get a notice after that?u know smtms it's a wonder
why people still add those whom they've thrown some
hurtful words some times ago
they were oh so superior b4 that they think they can say
whatever came to their mind n being an ignorant to others feeling
damn i so wanted to just ignore ur request
but i dont have the heart to
though i know even if i approved, it'll still
b pointless bcos they wont even give u a testi saying hello or smthg
what's the point of wanting to b in the friend's list then???

2-i hate my fb now that it's flooded with people's
stories that r totally unrelated to me,n yes the gedikness included
omg sakit mate!!pls act a little bit normal!
gah maybe i'll do some spring cleaning hahah

i had a weird dream this morning
i dreamed of a baby-my baby!
hahaha
i woke up startled n a bit confused
why a baby of all things/human being?
n when im done with paeds too hmmm

the syndrome in my previous post is called
anhydrotic ectodermal dysplasia-it's affecting the ectoderm
so in that child case, he's definitely hairless,
the skin is somewhat pale and thin
and the other thing is he cant control his temperature
n guess what they suggest??
try living in the cold country!
they might go developing seizure and end up with brain damage
if the temperature is too high
they dont have the normal temperature regulator as we do
because they dont sweat so yes no way of reducing the temperature
and they are prone to infection so explained the many
many tablet he's on

i saw another new rare syndrome this week
the child has rubinstein-taybi syndrome
most of the cases were diagnosed by the broad thumbs/great toes
as the facies are not obvious when they are still young
the disorder is due to the deletion of 16p13.3
her face show the features of the syndrome
like beaked nose,
ptosis, small maxilla, microcephaly,
small mouth with crowded irregular teeth, high palate, n
short upper lip
the great toes and the thumbs have some deviation as well
she has a delayed in speech
but she seems friendly enough to let us come near her
and played with us hehe

i didnt go in with dr.G this time so i probably missed
other interesting patients she has

i need to finish my case now ;)

i wanted to write about what happened in sligo
but one of the things include the unavailability of internet connection
at my bnb so yeah i couldnt go online
the modem was in faulty condition-u can see
from the look of it really
but somehow the bnb's makcik asked someone
to come n fix it-well he did but the internet was not that good
so i have to suffice with only browsing the very few pages that i really need to go to
before the connection disconnected or the signal became very weak
i know it'll b better if i just go down the stairs n just plugged it off for a few minutes but i was too lazy haha

i have an early start every morning-8.30 mostly everyday n the bnb is half an hour away from the general hospital on foot, my paeds ward is on level 7 so i normally take the lift
instead of the stairs :D
the clinics are on mostly everyday
the ward round is twice everyday
the scbu is quite small compare to galway
but there is this one baby with pneumothorax
he's a big baby with diabetic mother
but the insertion of drainage tube was a wow bcos i've never seen one b4 hehe
most of the babies there bcos of diabetic mother
pneumothorax baby is the only one in incubator
the rest are all quite well in their cribs

one pt who came to the clinic
had this very pale thin skin-like an albino
with no hair
i could see blood vessels on his head
very clearly like those of osteogenesis imperfecta
he had three fangs-like tooth at the age of three
the tongue was a bit long
n he's on several medications
later the consultant told me he has...........
i forgot-will post it later haha

i'll b going for my away attacment-in sligo again
for the next two weeks
am hoping for the good weather
n not icy cold-n yes no rain pls
as if that's possible haha

anyway we had an outing last night
the ikan was SEDAPPP as in malaysia hehe
that scallops was a little weird though
i dont really like the taste-or rather
i couldnt recall what the taste was like?!
i would say-if you want to eat fish then go to tamarind
thai garden is as the name is = tom yam/tom ka goong(tk reti eja)
indian food is best in kashmir
trattoria is when u feel like eating italian food :D

my bus is at 8 tonight
gah im so not in the mood to pack my bag!! :(

i snapped at someone on friday
i was very much annoyed with mostly everyone
i had a presentation in the morning
of which i only got the case
on wednesday night
left me with only a day to prepare

i was soooo annoyed
bcos seems like everyone want to b oncall
why the hell do they have to b on ward
when they r not suppose to
n when they not even presenting on the next day
or even in the week
it's alright if they were there to check on
their patients' chart for any progress
but when they asked the nurses for history-after 6 i mean
that's when they've taken other people's
right bcos of the soo many people want to
take history after 6 that wednesday
the nurses were reluctant to allow any more
i.e the people who were on the on call list to do our work
which is FINDING THE CASE FOR PRESENTATION!!
i was frustrated my head was throbbing
n the light was unbareable for my eyes
i had to go home n sleep
b4 i went to a&e with sarinah
thank god there were several pt there
i got the case from there
n my headache stopped heh :D

but anyway i'm done with case presentation
so i wont b banging my head on the wall
bcos i couldnt find one anymore hahaha
i must admit i became a meanie when
im annoyed or tired
n yes dont come near me when im not smiling
i might just lash it out at u :p

mc-mong=i feel crazy ;)

good or bad,
dying or running away,
only choose one from each two,
listen closely n remember this,
until i die i'll only choose u

does it happen in normal life???
flattering isnt it? ;p

the girls r having ladies night at the small lect theater csi
but the two of us just couldnt stay any longer than 20???minutes
my head was throbbing felt like it was going to burst
n my eyes felt strained : ( ughh
im sure intan was feeling worse since she was the one with
osce in the morning
n yes i had svrl doses of caffeine today
n right b4 we went to the csi as well
we tried mr.waffle at town
i was starving but couldnt finished the waffle
bcos it's toooo sweeeeet!but they all did??!weird
mmm-whose threshold level is higher now??:p
n qama had to remind me about the
all-4-siblings-dr-so-no-one-'ll-come-near-me?!grgrgr
so far no one ever pointed that out
but unconciously i tried not to tell new people
im meeting for the 1st time that most of my siblings r
doing medicine bcos yes im afraid they'll
run away after hearing that haha silly me
well mostly did anyway gah

oh this one kid pt hugged me at the pre-school i visited
he probably can sense who needs a hug for that dy haha
he's sooo cute! :D

i started my child psych today
hehe it was a dy full with mischievous kids
one had the urge to go back home
bcos he wants to quickly finish his project
of making a giant slingshot
at the end of the session his mum asked him what
he's gonna do with that thing n he replied
with a grin-his baby brother hahaha
but one thing i realize
most of the cases involve family members
the consultant seems to b very familiar with certain
family names, she could recall treating other members of
the family etc, she's a very pleasant lady :D
oh n i got my 3rd case!!! :)

today the kids mostly have AD/HD
but i only saw two kids who showed their ADHD
symptoms n that was during the bp/wt/ht measuring
i.e when the consultant, their mummy weren't around
they bcame quite aggressive
jumping around from one thing to another
that attracted them (hyperactivity),
they couldnt concentrate (inattention),
n yes it could b very dangerous with
a baby in the house n not to mention
to themselves,one of the core symptoms is impulsivity
of which they act on impulse ; )

i found this last night :D

i had the weirdest dream
my tooth fall out
but i didnt feel any pain just a bit sad
as i stare at the small little tooth in my palm

does it means anything?
i know people said it's a bad sign
im a little bit worried now
hopefully it wasnt aything
plus it wasnt within the 4 am sleep

im worried that bilah might b sick
its been such a long time since i last talk to her
my stubborn rebellious little sister
i still think of her as a little sister
i remember her doing the bird pose when she was little
n abah captured the moment with his camera
the photo might still b in the album in our house somewhere
how i miss my sister
n we have different hols time
maybe i need to go to her place sometime

here's some more photos from the ski trip :)

ayesha n me with the plastic sledges
kebar with his ski equipments
intan with her camera-so not in the photo heh :p

our little snowman

lost my jacket by this time

thick isnt it??

back in cuneo for dinner :)
the price is alright n the foods were delicious
the place is quite close to our hotel
n it was packed with people
we had to wait for half an hour or so
to get seated
but it was worth it :)

the next morning we took the train to ventimiglia,
well supposedly the train straight to nice
but we were a bit late n the train left

the weather was very nice
n u can see the palms tree in the background-err or is it
not obvious in this photo?? well we were
entering the Mediterranean area at this stage

the river flowing from the mountains into the sea

the rocky beach
we reachd nice train station at around 3 pm
from there we walked to our hostel
nice is a big city of which is not really to my liking
bcos of too many people n too many tall modern buildings
that was my first impression
but it changed as i walked around later that evening n
the next two days that we stayed there
nice has its old part as well
of which u can see the differnt in the pattern of the buildings design

they have people of different races n yes religions
eventhough we met many people whom i believe
are muslim, we couldnt find any places to eat
which have the halal signs
one which have the sign
somehow also sell pork-which is a bit confusing doesnt it??
maybe they have different meaning in halal
who knows
but anyway i learnt to like the city :)

the photo below was close to their chrstmas market :)

the picture above is taken by intan on the coach from cuneo airport
to the city centre, everything surrounding us was blanketed with
the white white snow n yes the sun was very bright probably
reflected by the snow,but honestly we didnt really feel cold
the first thing that came to my mind was, did i brought the wrong
clothing??haha but maybe they had the heater on full blown
both the airport n the bus bcos that airport is quite new,
so you know just for the sake of 1st impression hehe
we took the coach for like 20 minutes to the centre

the driver was not speaking anglaise at all
the only thing which made me sure of where we
were going was the sign boards along the street
n maybe bcos we pronounced the cuneo correctly
thus he understood our destination
there's no info.centre at the bus/train station
we had to ask around for the direction to our hotel
n yes as usual we used two different languages
with some sign language to get the direction we want
a lady at the station gave us a map n scribble the
way to get there on foot

the city was bigger than galway but there was not many
people around n the time was around noon on saturday
i thought maybe we were a bit in the outskirt
we check into the hotel n decided for a walk later
in the evening

this is located close to a carpark, not far away from our hotel
the picture below is of one of the piazza-piazza galimberti
they have sort of christmas market on sunday
u can see there wasnt any street performers at this time
n it was saturday
unlike what we normally see in other plaza or along the
shopstreet in galway,they have a quiet saturday i guess


on sunday,we took a taxi to limone piemonte for
60 euro-return journey,couldnt take a train bcos of a snowfall,
one of the ski resort was closed bcos of it,the day b4,
thank God it wasnt anything massive-well
not affecting all of the resorts i mean ;)
the snow was heavy, they advised us not to go to the higher point
but we did take the cabel car to see the area n snapped some photos

kbar decide to try skiing, changed his snowboots n rent the rest
of the gear for skiing-guess how much it cost him???
twenty-two euros only,ayesha n me changed our jacket n rent
2 sledges for thirty euros
earlier, the four of us had 4 snowboots which cost us 11 euros
n later we had coffee for like 40 cents a cup hehe
i was quite amazed with the cost really
i thought it might cost us much much more than that
anyway, we spent several hours playing
n watching kbar trying his hardest not to fall hahaha

there was this one guy i saw in the ski equipments
rental shops all confident trying his boots etc
but then i saw him again in the not-pro area
falling every few seconds bcos he couldnt controlled
his snowboard haha i thought omg he was all boosting
confidence in the shop but it's all gone now,
however that was the only time he played
i didnt see him around after that-poor guy,his friend was
better though, but this guy did used the board till he reached
the watching (??) area eventhough he kept on falling hehe

some people just go there for sun bathing
it was very bright n the rays were reflected from the snow
hence i lost my jacket in the middle of the
sledging hehe :D
i'll put up other photos later ; )

today wasnt that productive,well not yet but it's alright
im planning on writing my essay later
i talked to a pt today she's just full of negative thoughts
just about everything n i feel sorry for her
she seems to have no support from anyone
everyone seems bad in her eyes
but i dont know them-so cant really tell whether that's the truth
her thinking has been like that n cant b change-i think maybe
she doesnt really trust people so she doesnt open up
to the therapist she's been seeing
or maybe she doesnt trust another way of doing things
n stick to her old ways-the same goes with her mind
my consultant might put her n the family on another therapy
hopefully this time her family will
respond well to the therapy n in a way helping her to get through
this episode in her life
the meds doesnt seems to work with her ever

one pt came up to me this morning n demanded a 2nd opinion
on her mental health status
i was at a loss for a bit as she doesnt care even if im only a medical student
but thank god this sr nurse came n said she'll talk to the consultant
for her later, n the pt didnt press the issues further
she seems a bit aggressive though her size is normal
but we never knew what they r capable of if things got out of hand
n the ward is all locked all the time
bcos there's this one pt who has the tendency to run away from the mental hosp
imagine what will happen if one of the pt bcame too
aggressive or maybe homicidal???n u have no place to
escape n save urself??
gah im imagining things hahahha

oh the schedule tomorrow includes self-study
n nasrul mentioned smthg about japanese restaurant in town hehe :D

my bag still need to b packed
though i only have one more week to go, or maybe just 4 dys
not planning on presenting myself for any presentation for the last
day of the attachment, navid 'll b missing as well so
yes im coming back early next week too
the schedule 'll b as tight as last week
but im going to visit more places
n yes i'll b google-ing the places' location again this week heh

anyway, i saw a friend of mine
well rather the blog that i read-saying she's fed up with the unnoticeable
signs left by her everywhere ngehehe
i think i know what that's about-but
hopefully that person 'll realize all the signs directed to him sooner or later
it's easier if u already know that particular person's real feeling
then being left guessing what's going on in his mind
but smthg needs to happen linking both of their minds
together or else the girl might get prasan or deluded by silly small things
which is not actually for her
yes sad isnt it but i think that's just how girl is-we tend to get deluded
with things that we wanted to happen to/for us
even in a way, way beyond other people comprehension
sometimes we just miss the exact meaning of things bcos
of what we want to believe
-well maybe not me ahahaha though there were
times i had those believes as well-i learnt how to control
them-well i believe i mng to-err am i??
hmm but sometimes those feelings give the pleasure in life
it makes us anticipate things or eager for the next day
well not that it's unpleasureable feelings isnt it??? ; )

ari ni,my team is on leave?????
gah if i knew, i wouldnt have dragged myself
through a shower n cold morning to b there!
im in general now, got a history from one pt
though wasnt a full history since her uncle was waiting
to talk to her, but yeah they wont b there tomorrow as well
hehe nampaknya sye akn balik awal!!! :D

:D sligo was a bit foggy today as i was out
to the country side and went to see one pt
in tuberrcurry with this nurse n a consultant
but i wasnt that keen of the country side this morning
smthg else mngd to capture my view n kept it
away from the window the whole time
ngehehe
he even sent me to gnrl hosp.since
"u have a bad cough, n this weather is not helping"
i felt giddy-sory if i mngd to disrupt ur image of me :p

why do u have to be so cute
it's impossible to ignore you

those were the first few lines i heard from imogen heap
probably when i was out shopping with some friends
n i totally fall in love with her music
oh im currently in sligo again
at least this time i got a warm room and
a double bed with electric blanket :D
though once again im gonna miss smayang raye :(
here's another one by imogen heap : )



Here's the day you hoped would never come
Don't feed me violence
just run with me through rows of speeding cars.
The papercuts the cheating lovers
The coffee's never strong enough
i know you think it's more than just bad luck

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't lose your head
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

Sleeping pills know sleeping dogs lie
never far enough away
Glistening in the cold sweat of guilt
I've watched you slowly winding down for years
You can't keep on like this...
now's a bad a time as any

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't kill yourself
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..it was a long time ago


it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..it was a long time ago

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't lose your head
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't kill yourself
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

my pt couldnt remember why she was depressed
or rather she gave me smthg which is totally
made up-well i think so
bcos its not related to her but she believes that
is the reason emm now it sounds like delusion?haha
n that eo wants us to provide a complete
past psych history for the case
but not without the help of the charts
if i do ask the pt again
she will either repeat the same answer or
she might come out with a new story haaih...
n the truth is i couldnt find the depressive
episode in the chart anyway

im so happy that i found my list of jack johnson in my laptop!!
the internet is acting up again well as usual,
so i couldnt listen to the playlist in the youtube,
but anyway we had this video session this morning
i had a patient with pressure of speech
gah i thought i did very bad, but the doc.
conducting the playback session
told us it is hard to talk to pt with pressure of speech
and she also has this grandiose so yes she likes the camera hahha
i never have thought she would suddeny asked
whether we r being recorded in the middle of the session hahha
i was so embarrassed it's as if i didnt say anything about
the recording though i actually explained to her twice
but she was pleasant and wasnt that disinhibited this morning
and not as tired as the first time i talked to her last 2 weeks
or else she might just said she want to sleep in the
middle of the video session-yes it happened the first time
well she has BPAD really hence the symptoms ;)
im taking her as my second case :)
n i learnt what the intrusive really means today
i know it's like intrusion but dont
exactly know when they applied it
err do i sound stupid to u?haha

oh several other things i got from psych so far is
not to blame urself for anything that happen in the past or
maybe even think about anything that occurred that deep
since it might slightly lead to guilt which yes
might cause stronger guilty feeling as time passes
-u might end up depress
i believe i do feel depress smtms-but yeah
try not to think too much of it :)