i had the weirdest dream
my tooth fall out
but i didnt feel any pain just a bit sad
as i stare at the small little tooth in my palm

does it means anything?
i know people said it's a bad sign
im a little bit worried now
hopefully it wasnt aything
plus it wasnt within the 4 am sleep

im worried that bilah might b sick
its been such a long time since i last talk to her
my stubborn rebellious little sister
i still think of her as a little sister
i remember her doing the bird pose when she was little
n abah captured the moment with his camera
the photo might still b in the album in our house somewhere
how i miss my sister
n we have different hols time
maybe i need to go to her place sometime

here's some more photos from the ski trip :)

ayesha n me with the plastic sledges
kebar with his ski equipments
intan with her camera-so not in the photo heh :p

our little snowman

lost my jacket by this time

thick isnt it??

back in cuneo for dinner :)
the price is alright n the foods were delicious
the place is quite close to our hotel
n it was packed with people
we had to wait for half an hour or so
to get seated
but it was worth it :)

the next morning we took the train to ventimiglia,
well supposedly the train straight to nice
but we were a bit late n the train left

the weather was very nice
n u can see the palms tree in the background-err or is it
not obvious in this photo?? well we were
entering the Mediterranean area at this stage

the river flowing from the mountains into the sea

the rocky beach
we reachd nice train station at around 3 pm
from there we walked to our hostel
nice is a big city of which is not really to my liking
bcos of too many people n too many tall modern buildings
that was my first impression
but it changed as i walked around later that evening n
the next two days that we stayed there
nice has its old part as well
of which u can see the differnt in the pattern of the buildings design

they have people of different races n yes religions
eventhough we met many people whom i believe
are muslim, we couldnt find any places to eat
which have the halal signs
one which have the sign
somehow also sell pork-which is a bit confusing doesnt it??
maybe they have different meaning in halal
who knows
but anyway i learnt to like the city :)

the photo below was close to their chrstmas market :)

the picture above is taken by intan on the coach from cuneo airport
to the city centre, everything surrounding us was blanketed with
the white white snow n yes the sun was very bright probably
reflected by the snow,but honestly we didnt really feel cold
the first thing that came to my mind was, did i brought the wrong
clothing??haha but maybe they had the heater on full blown
both the airport n the bus bcos that airport is quite new,
so you know just for the sake of 1st impression hehe
we took the coach for like 20 minutes to the centre

the driver was not speaking anglaise at all
the only thing which made me sure of where we
were going was the sign boards along the street
n maybe bcos we pronounced the cuneo correctly
thus he understood our destination
there's no info.centre at the bus/train station
we had to ask around for the direction to our hotel
n yes as usual we used two different languages
with some sign language to get the direction we want
a lady at the station gave us a map n scribble the
way to get there on foot

the city was bigger than galway but there was not many
people around n the time was around noon on saturday
i thought maybe we were a bit in the outskirt
we check into the hotel n decided for a walk later
in the evening

this is located close to a carpark, not far away from our hotel
the picture below is of one of the piazza-piazza galimberti
they have sort of christmas market on sunday
u can see there wasnt any street performers at this time
n it was saturday
unlike what we normally see in other plaza or along the
shopstreet in galway,they have a quiet saturday i guess


on sunday,we took a taxi to limone piemonte for
60 euro-return journey,couldnt take a train bcos of a snowfall,
one of the ski resort was closed bcos of it,the day b4,
thank God it wasnt anything massive-well
not affecting all of the resorts i mean ;)
the snow was heavy, they advised us not to go to the higher point
but we did take the cabel car to see the area n snapped some photos

kbar decide to try skiing, changed his snowboots n rent the rest
of the gear for skiing-guess how much it cost him???
twenty-two euros only,ayesha n me changed our jacket n rent
2 sledges for thirty euros
earlier, the four of us had 4 snowboots which cost us 11 euros
n later we had coffee for like 40 cents a cup hehe
i was quite amazed with the cost really
i thought it might cost us much much more than that
anyway, we spent several hours playing
n watching kbar trying his hardest not to fall hahaha

there was this one guy i saw in the ski equipments
rental shops all confident trying his boots etc
but then i saw him again in the not-pro area
falling every few seconds bcos he couldnt controlled
his snowboard haha i thought omg he was all boosting
confidence in the shop but it's all gone now,
however that was the only time he played
i didnt see him around after that-poor guy,his friend was
better though, but this guy did used the board till he reached
the watching (??) area eventhough he kept on falling hehe

some people just go there for sun bathing
it was very bright n the rays were reflected from the snow
hence i lost my jacket in the middle of the
sledging hehe :D
i'll put up other photos later ; )

today wasnt that productive,well not yet but it's alright
im planning on writing my essay later
i talked to a pt today she's just full of negative thoughts
just about everything n i feel sorry for her
she seems to have no support from anyone
everyone seems bad in her eyes
but i dont know them-so cant really tell whether that's the truth
her thinking has been like that n cant b change-i think maybe
she doesnt really trust people so she doesnt open up
to the therapist she's been seeing
or maybe she doesnt trust another way of doing things
n stick to her old ways-the same goes with her mind
my consultant might put her n the family on another therapy
hopefully this time her family will
respond well to the therapy n in a way helping her to get through
this episode in her life
the meds doesnt seems to work with her ever

one pt came up to me this morning n demanded a 2nd opinion
on her mental health status
i was at a loss for a bit as she doesnt care even if im only a medical student
but thank god this sr nurse came n said she'll talk to the consultant
for her later, n the pt didnt press the issues further
she seems a bit aggressive though her size is normal
but we never knew what they r capable of if things got out of hand
n the ward is all locked all the time
bcos there's this one pt who has the tendency to run away from the mental hosp
imagine what will happen if one of the pt bcame too
aggressive or maybe homicidal???n u have no place to
escape n save urself??
gah im imagining things hahahha

oh the schedule tomorrow includes self-study
n nasrul mentioned smthg about japanese restaurant in town hehe :D

my bag still need to b packed
though i only have one more week to go, or maybe just 4 dys
not planning on presenting myself for any presentation for the last
day of the attachment, navid 'll b missing as well so
yes im coming back early next week too
the schedule 'll b as tight as last week
but im going to visit more places
n yes i'll b google-ing the places' location again this week heh

anyway, i saw a friend of mine
well rather the blog that i read-saying she's fed up with the unnoticeable
signs left by her everywhere ngehehe
i think i know what that's about-but
hopefully that person 'll realize all the signs directed to him sooner or later
it's easier if u already know that particular person's real feeling
then being left guessing what's going on in his mind
but smthg needs to happen linking both of their minds
together or else the girl might get prasan or deluded by silly small things
which is not actually for her
yes sad isnt it but i think that's just how girl is-we tend to get deluded
with things that we wanted to happen to/for us
even in a way, way beyond other people comprehension
sometimes we just miss the exact meaning of things bcos
of what we want to believe
-well maybe not me ahahaha though there were
times i had those believes as well-i learnt how to control
them-well i believe i mng to-err am i??
hmm but sometimes those feelings give the pleasure in life
it makes us anticipate things or eager for the next day
well not that it's unpleasureable feelings isnt it??? ; )

ari ni,my team is on leave?????
gah if i knew, i wouldnt have dragged myself
through a shower n cold morning to b there!
im in general now, got a history from one pt
though wasnt a full history since her uncle was waiting
to talk to her, but yeah they wont b there tomorrow as well
hehe nampaknya sye akn balik awal!!! :D

:D sligo was a bit foggy today as i was out
to the country side and went to see one pt
in tuberrcurry with this nurse n a consultant
but i wasnt that keen of the country side this morning
smthg else mngd to capture my view n kept it
away from the window the whole time
ngehehe
he even sent me to gnrl hosp.since
"u have a bad cough, n this weather is not helping"
i felt giddy-sory if i mngd to disrupt ur image of me :p

why do u have to be so cute
it's impossible to ignore you

those were the first few lines i heard from imogen heap
probably when i was out shopping with some friends
n i totally fall in love with her music
oh im currently in sligo again
at least this time i got a warm room and
a double bed with electric blanket :D
though once again im gonna miss smayang raye :(
here's another one by imogen heap : )



Here's the day you hoped would never come
Don't feed me violence
just run with me through rows of speeding cars.
The papercuts the cheating lovers
The coffee's never strong enough
i know you think it's more than just bad luck

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't lose your head
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

Sleeping pills know sleeping dogs lie
never far enough away
Glistening in the cold sweat of guilt
I've watched you slowly winding down for years
You can't keep on like this...
now's a bad a time as any

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't kill yourself
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..it was a long time ago


it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..

it's ok by me..it was a long time ago

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't lose your head
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

There there baby
it's just text book stuff
it's in the ABC of growing up
Now now darling
oh don't kill yourself
cause none of us were angels
and you know I love you yeah

my pt couldnt remember why she was depressed
or rather she gave me smthg which is totally
made up-well i think so
bcos its not related to her but she believes that
is the reason emm now it sounds like delusion?haha
n that eo wants us to provide a complete
past psych history for the case
but not without the help of the charts
if i do ask the pt again
she will either repeat the same answer or
she might come out with a new story haaih...
n the truth is i couldnt find the depressive
episode in the chart anyway

im so happy that i found my list of jack johnson in my laptop!!
the internet is acting up again well as usual,
so i couldnt listen to the playlist in the youtube,
but anyway we had this video session this morning
i had a patient with pressure of speech
gah i thought i did very bad, but the doc.
conducting the playback session
told us it is hard to talk to pt with pressure of speech
and she also has this grandiose so yes she likes the camera hahha
i never have thought she would suddeny asked
whether we r being recorded in the middle of the session hahha
i was so embarrassed it's as if i didnt say anything about
the recording though i actually explained to her twice
but she was pleasant and wasnt that disinhibited this morning
and not as tired as the first time i talked to her last 2 weeks
or else she might just said she want to sleep in the
middle of the video session-yes it happened the first time
well she has BPAD really hence the symptoms ;)
im taking her as my second case :)
n i learnt what the intrusive really means today
i know it's like intrusion but dont
exactly know when they applied it
err do i sound stupid to u?haha

oh several other things i got from psych so far is
not to blame urself for anything that happen in the past or
maybe even think about anything that occurred that deep
since it might slightly lead to guilt which yes
might cause stronger guilty feeling as time passes
-u might end up depress
i believe i do feel depress smtms-but yeah
try not to think too much of it :)

i couldnt sleep, i've been up for two hours
this is like waking 4 hours earlier then my normal waking hour
n gah im bloated from eating too much
could that b the reason?

tomorrow i have clinic to attend, but i want to go
n talk to this particular pt as well for my case report
at least i have one case from this week
n the second one from the next week
then wait for the child psych week for one more case

the clinic is at 10
n we have to go to one of psych place later in the afternoon
oh i need to go to the bank by this week too

hahah did i really wrote morocco???
oops salah sbenarnya monaco
haha :p
no wonder jawe tanya haha

oh now i feel like eating the cakes
at rafiq's bday-cheese cake aman grgrgr
maybe i should go to town n cari cheese
cake kt mark n spencer :D
last night the chef n the gang were brilliant - hence the full stomach
n no space for cakes la
mmm tkde photos nk upload...

my other brother had shingles last week, on the face!
kesian maher,probably bcos he was stress out due to the recent xam
n my sister got 5a in upsr :D
i know it's only upsr but no one else in the family
has big exam this yr-aisyah's the only one heh

we bought tickets for winter hols!!!
on 20th of dec.we'll be arriving at cuneo-close to alps
stay there for two nights n 'll go to nice,france
of which we'll take a dy trip to morocco :D hehe
hopefully evrything'll b alright :)

1-music will bring back memories
=im not fond of memories
=yes im not

2-all this while i only talked about others
but dont u know i have feelings too???
just that i dont freely tell people...

3-now that i think about it
maybe it's not the best arrangement after all
i need to follow my heart

3-its hurt but i dont know how to make it goes away
pls help me pls

for some reason i dont know how to proceed with my case anymore
it's like im having a writer block or smthg
u seem to progress but actually u r not
the only thing improving is the number of the word counts
not the main important points which will give the marks for u
grgrggrgr!!!!

yesterday was the surprise party
some of the photos were taken when not all of us r ready
but i like most of them
the people/scene captured seems alive n vibrant
they gave u the happy feeling
all credits goes to aimee's personal photographer haha

i'm so glad to b back to my own room
to the comfort of my own duvet
n yes to get to see the familiar faces again :)

im back in galway for the weekend
the house in sligo was not as expected but i'll bare with it for the next week
the sissy guy was pissing me off this morning just b4 i left
yes he's sissy
and of course not a gentleman at all
he was so adamant to "show" me the appropriate way of
closing the door to even ask me to stay put on the stairs
while i was coming down holding a big heavy bag with me
n he slumberly perform the appropriate way of closing the toilet door,
at that time i just thought
he must b stupid bcos
this morning the wind was blowing in through the window in the toilet
of which i believe was opened by him n pushed the door closed with a bang
but i didnt say anything to him of his stupidity
omg i couldnt believe there could b such a guy
to make matter worst, when i was rushing to get the house door
as the taxi arrived, he asked whether i've eaten smthg
i wasnt thinking of anything bad of him yet, so i just said im gonna grab smthg at the bus station
but this stupid guy rephrased his question,n said whether i've been in the kitchen this morning
guess why???
apparently someone left some bread crumbs on the dining table!!?!
the only person been in the kitchen b4 him was the owner of the house
n yes that shut him up

believe it or not
i've made the stupidest mistake ever!!!
grgrgrg now i need to change the date again
omg i pray that sligo 'll b a better place then the labour ward in galway

we r 5th med now!!!

the merah people!

happy eid mubarak everyone!!!
it's been quite a while now
im doing my ong rotation for the moment
and for the first time in my five years away from home
i couldnt go for eid prayer-we had tutorials the whole morning
but we kinda waver a bit in the afternoon hence we skipped classes
ehehe
tp since i didnt plan to go for any open house that day, i left my camera at home
jd gamba raye kna amik from others
i didnt even have a photo of the three of us!!
maybe will take some during raye celebration or international dinner night

oh i've finally got a case for case commentary
though not as interesting as other cases but at least i've got one
the lady had a tvt done on her
of which i still have lots of reading to do to complete my report
i'll b away to sligo starting this 18th of october for my rotation

i went to town this morning
and have to pay 100 for yana's hepB test-err mum's money
not mine
i dont know whether it's me who is unaware of the expensiveness all this time
or it's only recently being this expensive
and that is without even any other check-up
the letter came quite late-as usual
since we are not in kl
and they(iumc) are expecting the test result this 26th of august
hopefully the lab 'll b able to fax the result by sunday next week
mara's documents are still on their way here-though they said
they'll b using the post laju service hmm..

i think this blog needs an update

life was at a slow pace this couple of weeks
with my mum n dad gone for their umrah
so only my siblings n i are left at home right this moment
maher is home for the school hols.
n the new house next to ours is brought up to life with
their kids running n making noises around the house.
unfortunately they started their little activities when the first
light comes up indicating the start of a new day-well yes everyday!
which is not that pleasant since they are noisy :(
n im not use to it-just yet
n my room is unpractically facing their house too
but they'll only be here for the hols so it's gonna b
peaceful again-well the army aircrafts are still around though

kmb probably sending 13 newbies to nuig
n this sist of mine is still waiting for her offer letter
which seem to b quite late-n she didnt make
any effort of checking any list available to confirm her
college status?!